Table of Contents
1 My Writing Assignment 1
2 Battlefield Promotion 9
3 Crisis du Jour 22
4 The Tower of Babble 30
5 Who Needs Ted? 38
6 Teeter-Tottering through Life 51
7 In-Flight Safety Instructions 61
8 Cat without a Name, Cell without a Number 72
9 Mr. Rogers to the Rescue 81
10 Please, No Thank You, Please! 89
11 The Feet of Dorian Gray 98
12 Summer of Silence 115
13 The Petite Man's Guide to Parenting 125
14 Here's to Friends! 134
15 Alligator Tales 144
16 Thank You, Baba 156
17 Grand Central Station 165
18 TGIF 173
19 Hocus-Pocus 182
20 A Par before Dying 193
21 The Sing Sing Thing 205
22 The Long Goodbye 220
23 Thanks for the Memories 236
Afterword: Goodbye Letter to Ethan 251